MySpace Archive: On Procrastination

In an attempt to beef up this blog's appearance before I actually tell anyone about its existence, and also to relive some of my wacky antics over on MySpace, I am archiving all of my old posts over here at The Slog.

This piece was meant to remind people that one day, in some way, I would actually finish that whole 80s series that had ones of readers clamoring for more. It's only been two months since I posted this one back there, and I have high hopes that maybe I will actually write about this in the next 1-3,476 days.

I suppose I could just knuckle down, do a quick image search on Google, and throw together some half-baked commentary on the Goonies, but to be honest, a casual rewatching of Goonies one Saturday afternoon last spring started this whole solipsistic odyssey. I have to do right by Mikey, Chunk, Sloth, Brand & Co. But not Mouth. Never Mouth.

This originally had numerous comments in parenthesis interspersed throughout. I have changed them to footnotes, as I cranked this puppy out in like 2 minutes a couple of months ago, with very minimal editing, and was too lazy to format it. I have rectified this.

The upshot of this is that now you have to do a shit-ton of scrolling just to find out I'm lazy.

There. I've given you no need to read this. See you after the post.

[Originally posted on Thursday, January 17, 2008]

Teaser trailer for my long delayed blog piece

Okay, teaser trailer is a misleading term. I'm not showing you highlights for my upcoming blogstrosity, The Dark Underbelly of the 80s, Part 3.¹

The real purpose² is to let all 3.14159etc of you that read³ this blog⁴ that I haven't forgotten this chilling expose of my psyche as reflected through 80s movies.⁵ Believe it⁶ or not,⁷ I am planning⁸ to actually finish this soon.⁹

This next one is going to be a tough one, since it will dredge up some repressed memories. Either about my shitty childhood or possibly about the Oakland Raiders.

Only time will tell.

As anyone who knows me would say, "That guy owes me 50 bucks!"

Wait. That's not what I meant. Let me start over.

As anyone who knows me would say, "Wolter puts off everything he does. EVERYTHING!" This composite person would then go on to mention that I owe him/her 50 bucks. Hopefully, he/she will then punch a wall in frustration, cause that would be so punk, man.

It's not that I don't like to accomplish things. Really it's not. I love the feeling of Getting Something Done. I just love the feeling of Doing Anything Other Than What I Should Be Doing a little more. Why write a paper when you could play Tetris for 3 hours? Why go grocery shopping when you could be reading a perfectly good biography of John C. Calhoun? Why do...oh, I don't know...your job...when you could write a blog about how you really should be doing your job. And then comment on it (how Meta).

Anyway, there are only two more posts left in the MySpace Blog Archive (Huzzah!). Technically one, as the last post is just a post telling people that there are posts from there over here. I probably won't move that over, as the Meta-quotient on that commentary would cause The-Slog to collapse into a Neutron Star.

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1. Or, as I have taken to calling it, Chinese Democracy II: The Crap-ening.
2. There is no real purpose.
3. Have read in the past.
4. Pathetic time waster.
5. Random crap I throw together at the last minute.
6. Don't.
7. Probably wise.
8. ...Am fooling myself.
9. ....By February 29th, 2012 [Dude, seriously. Am I obsessed with that year or what? It's mentioned in like 4 of my posts. I should start a "2012" label. Eh...maybe later]

I should probably admit at this point that all of those footnotes were put in largely to annoy the reader (you). The Slog: alienating practically non-existent readers since, well...now.